Stop Tracking Applications.
Start Tracking Relationships.
Silje Sundal
January 26, 2026 · 8 min read
I've been thinking a lot about why job searching feels so demoralizing for so many people. You send application after application, and... silence. Your spreadsheet grows longer, but your hope gets shorter.
Then I started thinking about it differently. What if we've been measuring the wrong things?
The Insight
Applications sent is a lagging indicator. It's an outcome you can't control. But coffees had, messages sent, events attended — those are leading indicators. They're the activities that cause opportunities to emerge.
The Psychology of Lagging vs Leading
Think about it this way. When you track applications, you're tracking outputs:
- ✗Applications sent → can't control who responds
- ✗Interviews scheduled → can't control who calls
- ✗Offers received → can't control hiring decisions
When you track activities, you're tracking inputs:
- ✓Coffees scheduled → you control who you ask
- ✓LinkedIn messages sent → you control the outreach
- ✓Events attended → you control where you show up
- ✓Introductions requested → you control who you ask
Why This Matters for Your Mental Health
When you focus on things you can't control, you feel helpless. When you focus on activities you can control, you feel empowered. You had 3 coffees this week? That's progress. You attended that networking dinner? That's progress. Even if no job materializes immediately, you're building the foundation.
What Activities Should You Track?
Here's the relationship funnel — from first contact to real connection:
Personal Outreach
It starts here. LinkedIn messages, emails to specific people. Personalized, not mass-blasted.
Responses Received
When someone responds, that's a positive signal. Track these — they're your pipeline.
Coffees & Calls
The goal. 1-on-1 conversations build real relationships. Virtual or in-person, these are gold.
Introductions Made & Received
Warm intros are 10x more effective than cold outreach. Ask for them and give them.
Events & Dinners
Conferences, meetups, networking dinners. Multiple connections in one evening.
A Week in the New Mindset
Here's what a good week looks like when you're tracking the right things:
This Week's Momentum
3
Coffees
8
Outreach
2
Intros
13 total interactions this week. You're building real momentum.
Notice what's not in that summary? "Applications sent." Because that's not what leads to jobs. Relationships lead to jobs. Activities lead to relationships.
The Job is a Lagging Indicator
Here's the truth that's hard to accept: The job itself is a lagging indicator.
It's the outcome of weeks or months of relationship-building. You can't force it to happen faster by sending more applications. But you can accelerate it by having more conversations, attending more events, and asking for more introductions.
When you internalize this, something shifts. Instead of waking up thinking "I need to apply to 10 jobs today," you wake up thinking "Who can I have a conversation with today?"
Suggested Weekly Goals
- ☕2-3 coffees or calls with people in your target industry
- 💬5-10 personalized messages to specific people at target companies
- 🎤1 event (meetup, conference, networking dinner)
- 🤝Ask for 1 intro from someone you already know
How ByeByeApply Helps
We've built interaction logging directly into your company list. For every company you're interested in, you can track:
- •Coffees and calls you've had with people there
- •LinkedIn messages and emails you've sent
- •Events where you've met people from the company
- •Introductions you've received
- •Positive signals (responses, good conversations)
Your sidebar shows your weekly momentum — how many interactions you've had across all your target companies. It celebrates your effort, not just your outcomes.
Key Takeaways
- 1.Applications are lagging indicators — you can't control who responds
- 2.Activities (coffees, calls, events, intros) are leading indicators you CAN control
- 3.Focus on leading indicators reduces anxiety and creates real progress
- 4.The job itself is a lagging indicator — it emerges from relationship-building
- 5.Track your weekly momentum: coffees, outreach, events, intros
The shift is simple: Instead of counting applications, count conversations. Instead of waiting for responses, focus on what you can control. The outcomes will follow.
About Silje Sundal
Founder & CEO
Silje brings over 20 years of experience from leading enterprise software companies including HP, Citrix, and Workday. With deep expertise in Revenue Operations and GTM strategy, she's passionate about using AI to transform how people find work that makes them thrive.